


The New Job

by demalore



Category: Wander Over Yonder
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-04
Packaged: 2018-07-20 00:21:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7383448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demalore/pseuds/demalore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Peepers hadn't exactly been in the market for a career change, but who is he to argue with the galaxy's most dangerous villain?  Besides, maybe a little change would be for the best...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to @lesbianmonarch for rambling with me about short eyeball men, and for the use of her amazing watchdog OC Harold!!

It was Commander Peepers’ latest “Surefire Plan to Stop Dominator”, and it was going just as well as his last 37 “Surefire Plans”.  Dominator was effortlessly deflecting everything Peepers had to throw at her, from catapulted boulders to ice missiles.  Peepers’ elite team of soldiers hadn’t been able to land a single blow, and the commander himself was running out of ideas.  And while the sky filled with lava and exploding watchdogs, Lord Hater, ignoring the devastation around him, fought for one glorious second of Lord Dominator’s attention.

“Hey! Hey, Dominator!” Lord Hater shouted over the agonizing screams of his own troops, “I wrote you this poem, and it’s basically the most awesome and romantic thing ever written!  Stop blasting my watchdogs for  _ one second _ so I can read it to you!”

Paying the lovesick skeleton no mind, Lord Dominator continued her assault on the watchdogs, sending them screaming back to their ship.  Peepers called a retreat, but it didn’t seem like Lord Hater was going to give up anytime soon.  The very ground beneath them was shattering into dust, and he was still trying to recite  _ poetry. _

The ground gave a fatal creak, and the planet began splitting in two under the force of Lord Dominator’s drill.  The watchdogs made it safely to the ship, but Peepers pressed further into the destruction, trying to reach Lord Hater.

“I’m the greatest you’ll ever see, so you should be dating me!” Hater recited, his voice all but lost in the sound of the planet falling apart.  “Huh, that doesn’t sound right.  Maybe I should change it to  _ very _ greatest…”

With the watchdogs out of her way, Lord Dominator turned her attention to Hater.  “Ugh, would you just give it up!” she groaned.  She raised her arm toward Hater, preparing a final lava blast.

Peepers’ eye widened as a barrage of lava shot toward Lord Hater, who was still looking down at his poem, scribbling in his latest revision.  He heard the Skullship behind him flying to his aid, but knew it wouldn’t make it in time.

Using all the strength his short little legs had to offer, Peepers leapt toward Hater, pushing him aside and substituting himself as the target of the lava blast.  Hater stumbled away, just in time to be scooped up by the Skullship’s tongue as it flew by.  The lava burned Peepers’ body, but cooled quickly, freezing his limbs into a rock-coated statue.  Only his eye was still free, allowing him to watch as the Skullship disappeared into the safe void of space.

The ground beneath Peepers groaned again, and a chasm split open right next to him.  Peepers tried rocking his frozen form back and forth, to move even an inch away from certain death, but he couldn’t budge.   _ Is this how it ends? _ He thought miserably,  _ left behind by my own troops to die in a pit? _

As if things couldn’t get any worse, an imposing shadow crept over him.  After seeing who it was, Peepers wished he  _ would _ fall into the pit, but Dominator grabbed him before the ground gave way.  All Peepers could do was scream, and when lava bubbled over his head, he couldn’t even do that.

 

“Oh-ho, man! The look on your face!  What I wouldn’t give to--oh, wait a minute!”

The lava covering Peepers’ face receded, letting him take in a much-needed breath.  Dominator’s ship was sweltering, but he shivered as he looked around helplessly, the very walls coursing with deadly lava.

“No, no no no no!” Peepers whimpered, unbidden tears spilling onto his lava shell.

“Ew, no, not like that,” Dominator’s face scrunched with disgust.  “I’m looking for ‘terror’ here, tiny, not ‘misery’.”

Peepers twisted his head around as far as he could to gawk at Dominator.  She was out of her armor, sitting in what looked like a normal office chair.  She spun around lazily, rolling her head back and forth.

“So, you gonna ask what’s going on, or do I have to do everything?” she prompted irritably.  She stood from her chair and strode over to Peepers, sending him into another state of hysterics.

“Okay, you can stop now!” she said in a louder, even more irritated voice.  The lava around Peepers’ body melted away, sending him to the floor in a puddle of his own tears.

Peepers closed his eye, deaf to Dominator’s words, but by the tone of her voice, he knew was doomed.  He weakly draped an arm over his head, still shaking.   _ At least I’ll be a martyr for the Hater Empire,  _ he consoled himself as he waited for the finishing blow.

When no such blow came, he cracked open his eye.  Dominator was still standing above him, but she seemed more annoyed than angry.  He hadn’t thought about why she had bothered bringing him onto her ship instead of just leaving him to die, but now curiosity got the better of him.

“What...what happened?” he stammered, rising to an unsteady stand.

“Well for one thing,” Dominator laughed dryly, “I saved your flarping  _ life _ .  That’s a first for me, so don’t take it for granted.”

“Why?”  Peepers’ mind raced for an answer to this improbable question.  Sympathy he immediately ruled out as a factor, since Dominator was even more ruthless than  _ he _ was.  She couldn’t be using him as a bargaining chip against Hater, since there wasn’t anything she could possibly want from him.  Well, except for maybe…

“I-If you’re after information, I’m not giving up anything!” Peepers said proudly, although a tremor had returned to his voice.  “No matter how you torture me, I’ll never talk!”

“Relax, pipsqueak,” Dominator groaned.  “I don’t  _ need _ anything from you,  _ definitely _ not information.”

Peepers relaxed a bit.  “Then, what--”

“I’m offering you a job,” Dominator grinned, although the look of her smirk made it sound less like an offer and more like a command.

“A job?”  Peepers was stunned.  “Doing what?”

Dominator spun over to her computer, bringing up a hologram model of the galaxy.  “See, with all these stupid planets everywhere, it’s hard to keep track of which ones are dominated and which ones aren’t.  It’s a real bummer to travel all the way to a planet with this whole  _ plan _ on how to destroy a planet just to find out that it’s already  _ destroyed _ .”

Dominator smashed a molten fist onto the keyboard, dissipating the hologram into a hissing screen of static.  Peepers shuddered, but kept his eye on Dominator, too intrigued now to feel afraid.

“You...want me to help you dominate planets?”

“Nah, you just have to find them, do a little planning.   _ I’ll _ take care the dominating.”

Peepers gulped.  “Wh-what about the bots?”  He knew she had used them to find planets before, and if she was so quick to throw  _ them _ away, who was to say she wouldn’t do the same to him?

“Bots are too slow.  Use them if you want, but I think you’d be faster than all of them combined.”

That sounded dangerously close to a compliment.  Back on his guard, Peepers pressed, “Y-y’ think?”

“Blinky, I’ve seen enough of your plans to know that you aren’t a  _ total  _ idiot,” Dominator said, rolling her eyes.  “Honestly, if it weren’t for that boneheaded ‘leader’ of yours, I might actually have some  _ fun _ trying to stop you.”

Peepers’ anger flared against Dominator’s insult, his chest puffing out and his mind already crafting a proper retort.  Thankfully, after reminding himself of where he was and who he was talking to, he calmed down and didn’t say anything that could get him fried.

And in that moment of clarity, Peepers realized that Dominator was  _ right. _  Peepers had known for ages that the greatest threat to the Hater empire was often Hater himself, but that had just been another obstacle for him to overcome.  He couldn’t blame Hater for being easily distracted; Hater was the reason Peepers got into galactic domination in the first place.  Whenever he began to doubt that his plans would work, Peepers just worked twice as hard, hoping that  _ this _ time Lord Hater wouldn’t get in the way.  Dominator’s words only confirmed what he had unconsciously known for a long time.

Lord Hater was only getting in his way.  Peepers was capable of so much more.

Peepers looked up at Dominator, hope glimmering in his single red eye.  Was this the way it had to be, turning against his longtime allies?  Annoying as they were, Peepers couldn’t cut Hater and the watchdogs off like that.  Especially when Dominator could kick him to the curb on a whim, leaving him with no allies at all.

“And!  And,” Dominator went on frantically, raising one finger in the air victoriously.  “If you do this for me, I promise I won’t destroy you!  Can’t get a better deal than  _ that _ .”

When Peepers didn’t immediately answer, Dominator frowned.  “And I won’t destroy Hater or those eyeball guys either.  That enough for you?”

Astonished, Peepers clasped his hands to his chest.  He wouldn’t have imagined teaming up with Dominator before, but this was too good to be true.  Safety from Dominator, a break from conjuring elaborate schemes to catch Wander, all while protecting Lord Hater?  “R-really?” he sniffed, wiping his eye sloppily with his glove.

“Sure, whatever,” Dominator said, having turned back to her computer and nearly forgotten about Peepers.  “So what’ll it be?  A new job, or a hideous, fiery death?”

Dominator spun around in her chair to see Peepers, too choked up to speak, giving her a salute.  His eyelids were brimming with tears, pinched together in what could only be seen as a watchdog smile.

Dominator crossed her arms, chuckling at the pitiful display.  “New job it is, then.”

 

“Is this big enough?”

The lava walls receded, revealing a large, round room.  An enormous computer took up the entire far wall, and a bed was pushed to the side.  Warm red and orange light pulsed around the nearly empty room, and Peepers found that it really wasn’t all too different from his room on the Skullship.

“Y-yes!” Peepers said with a start, carefully approaching the towering computer monitor.  It was nearly the size of the screens they’d use during briefing meetings with dozens of other watchdogs.  This was all for him?

“Super,” Dominator snipped, typing something into a keypad on the wall.  A bot rolled up right next to Peepers, flattening him against the computer.

“Bot 29 will keep an eye on you. If you need anything, just order it around.”

Peepers squinted at the bot, overcoming his instinct to run away from it.  Now that he had a closer look, it looked almost like a watchdog, just more dangerous and less irritating.

“Understood, thank you!...” Peepers trailed off, then added a soft, “...Sir?”

“Dominator’s fine,” his new boss said, stepping out of the room as the walls began to seal back up.  “Now get to work, minion!”  
“Yes, Dominator!” Peepers said quickly before the walls closed.  He looked from the bot--still pressed against him, awaiting instructions--to the bed, then to the glorious, glorious computer.  He couldn’t believe how much things had changed in the past few hours of his life, going from the commander of an empire to the underling of his former enemy.  And as much as he hated to admit it, it was already feeling like home.

“This...this is fine,” he muttered to himself, easily pushing the robot servant aside and activating the computer.  “I...I can get used to this.”

 

“I can’t believe this!” Dominator stormed across the room, snatched the thick stack of papers from Peepers’ trembling hands, and began to pace.  “I give you  _ two  _ days to come up with a plan, and  _ this _ is all you have?”

Flipping the title page of Peepers’ 283-page plan aside, Dominator held out a meticulously annotated sketch of Wander.  “Nearly three hundred pages of reports, and it’s all about some orange doofus!”

“W-Wander’s been a serious threat in the past!” Peepers defended, holding his pointing rod meekly behind his back.  “He’s very unpredictable, I had to analyze every possi-”

“Unpredictable?!” Dominator exclaimed, nearly dropping the papers.  “Listen, runt, if Wander shows up, one of two things is going to happen:  _ one _ , I vaporize him, or  _ two _ , I vaporize his stupid horse friend and  _ then _ him.”  Dominator flipped through the rest of the pages before flinging them aside.  “And here I was thinking you’d be smart enough to plan for  _ actual _ threats, like a shift in the gravity field-”

“‘Recommendations for lessened gravitational disruptance’, page seventy-two,” Peepers muttered automatically, the crispness of his voice contradicting his miserable slump.

Dominator gawked at him.  Her mouth hung open silently during the pause in her tirade, then twitched as she picked it back up.  “O-or for a possible planetary retaliation-”

“‘Blind spots in the planetary security net’, page one-oh-eight,” Peepers interrupted again, still slouched over.

“Shut up!” Dominator ordered.  Peepers looked up with surprise, not realizing that he had been interrupting her.  Dominator scrambled to retrieve the papers she had dropped.

“There’s no way you-”  She held page 72 in her hand, one of the few pages without a sketch of Wander, or even Sylvia.  Sure enough, “Recommendations for lessened gravity disturbance” had been scrawled across the top, accompanied with detailed sketches of the ship and various complicated devices to stabilize it.

“This...this is  _ incredible _ ,” Dominator whispered, unable to muffle her awe.  She had to admit, this single page examined the ship’s effects on local gravity more than she ever had.  It was concise, but the solutions were flawless.

“I-I’m sorry, Sir!” Peepers blubbered, “I promise, I’ll keep it shorter next-”

“Shorter?” Dominator boomed, beaming up at Peepers.  “I need  _ more _ of this!  What else ya got?”

“Oh! Ah,” Peepers hadn’t prepared anything, but a slew of ideas came to him out of nowhere.  “I had a few suggestions for minimizing the ship’s use of Volcanium X, as well as a more advanced bot AI-”

“Well start working on  _ that _ , and stop with all this Wander stuff,” Dominator said, picking out the useful parts of Peepers’ report while letting the Wander-related material fall to the floor.  “I’m telling you, if you keep this up, we’ll have the galaxy dominated in no time!”

Dominator’s praise sent Peepers’ heart fluttering.  He was too giddy to have any inhibitions about the phrase ‘galaxy dominated in no time’, and gave Dominator a happy salute.

“Yes, Dominator!”


	2. Chapter 2

The Skullship had been especially somber for days.  Hater couldn’t place the reason why, but all of the watchdogs were acting gloomy, dragging their feet and giving half-hearted cheers at the rallies, when they were usually loud and energetic.  Captain Tim seemed off as well, only trying to maul one or two watchdogs before calling it a day.  For the first time since its official broadcast had begun, “Eye on the Skullship” was off the air, even Andy unable to say anything cheerful.  Lord Hater didn’t mind that the watchdogs weren’t acting  _ happy _ , but all this dreariness was starting to bum him out.

The only one who  _ wasn’t _ acting depressed was Commander Peepers, but he had been acting strangely, too.  He hadn’t said a word since their most recent attempt to woo (or as Peepers would say, ‘destroy’) Dominator.  Peepers just stood by his side, nodding along with whatever Hater said, but providing none of his own opinions.  It was pretty creepy.

Hater called another rally to try and lift the watchdogs’ spirits, but no such luck.  They all showed up, but brought their overbearing sadness with them.  Even as Hater hollered and danced on the stage and fireworks shot into the air, not a single watchdog raised their eye from their shoes.

“What’s wrong with you guys!” Hater finally yelled, waving his arms to get the watchdogs’ attention.  A few glanced up, but their gazes sunk right back to the floor.

“Peepers, order them to cheer, or smile, or  _ something! _ ” Hater begged his commander, who was still standing right by his side.  Peepers glanced nervously at the crowd of watchdogs, who were now looking at him with the same apprehension.  Sweat rolled down Peepers’ eye, but he didn’t choke out a single word.

Hater snatched Peepers up, shaking him desperately.  “Come on, C-Peeps, say  _ something! _  What’s wrong with everyone?!?”

Peepers began whining softly, then burst into tears.  Except the watchdog he was holding wasn’t Peepers--Lord Hater knew very well what Peepers’ crying sounded like, and this wasn’t high-pitched or nasally enough to be it.  He set the tearful watchdog down and stepped back, scanning the crowd for some kind of explanation.

“I’m sorry, Sir!” the imposter Peepers said through an eyeful of tears, his voice far deeper than that of the true commander.  “W-we didn’t know how to tell you, and we thought...we thought you might not notice!”

“Notice what?  What aren’t you telling me?” Hater shouted, angry lightning jolting around his clenched fists.

“Commander Peepers, he…”  the watchdog made a hiccupy noise, the horrid word refusing to crawl out of his throat.

“He’s  _ gone!” _ a watchdog in the crowd cried, breaking the swollen bubble of silence that had entombed the watchdogs, sending them all into uncontrollable misery.  Throughout the conference room, watchdogs leaned on each other, supporting their neighbors as they doubled over with sobs.

Staring blankly at his broken army, Hater kept asking, “Gone?  What do you mean Peepers is gone?”  No one was listening to him, too caught up in their grief to answer.

“It...it was during our last mission, Sir,” imposter Peepers explained once he was able to stop crying.  “The Commander pushed you out of the way, b-b-but-”

“But what?  What happened to Peepers?”  Hater asked frantically, unconsciously pulling his hood over his ears so he wouldn’t hear the dreaded answer.

“D-Dominator got him!” the watchdog yelled, sending a fresh wave of despair over the other soldiers.

Hater stared into the empty space above imposter Peepers’ head.  “Dominator...got...Peepers?” he muttered.  Hater’s low whisper cut off all sounds of crying.  The watchdogs simply watched, preparing for one of Hater’s classic outbursts.

Lord Hater didn’t appear angry.  He didn’t seem to be feeling  _ anything _ .  He was empty, for a moment, even of hate.

A green glimmer danced about his eyes, and his face flattened into a familiar mask of rage.  “Lord Dominator thinks she can destroy my commander and get away with it?” he grumbled, voice crescendoing until it filled the conference room.  The watchdogs perked up, standing up straighter as Lord Hater rose into the air.

“Well, she’ll have an  _ entire army _ to answer to!” Lord Hater shouted, a flurry of cheers raising him even higher.  Bursts of lightning exploded above the impassioned watchdogs, replacing any remaining sorrow with addictive fury.

“We’ll make Dominator regret laying so much as a  _ finger _ on him!” Lord Hater went on.  “Today, we don’t just fight for our empire, we fight for our  _ commander! _ ”

The watchdogs’ cheers grew to a dull roar.  No longer slouching, the watchdogs were leaping with glee, many already drawing their blasters and firing shots into the air.

For once, Lord Hater’s army was wholeheartedly united under him, and with the sight of Peepers being dragged away still fresh in their minds, they were a force to be reckoned with.

 

Without a single command, the watchdogs marched to their stations.  They may have been lacking a commanding officer, but Commander Peepers’ memory lived on in the fully stocked arsenal, and each watchdog took the largest weapon they could carry.  Their stoic leader assumed his position at the head of the Skullship, confidently taking the unfamiliar controls.  No one spoke as the ship’s engines started up, taking them all straight to the doorstep of the most dangerous villain in the galaxy.  They had the firepower, and they had the determination.

All they needed was a plan.

Dominator’s ship was quiet as the Skullship flew to its side.  Not finding a visible entryway, Lord Hater created his own with a blast of lightning.  Watchdogs streamed from the Skullship’s mouth onto the enemy vessel, blasters raised, all eyes forward.  Even Jerry, who had witnessed firsthand the terrors of Dominator’s ship, didn’t hesitate to board.

Lord Hater followed behind them, electricity crackling at his fingertips.  He didn’t need a plan; if he ran into bots, he’d blast them, and when he found Dominator, he’d blast her, too.  He’d blast this whole ship to smithereens if he had to.

 

“Wait, what do you mean, ‘it’s good’?”

Dominator squinted at Peepers.  “I mean  _ it’s good _ , like, it’s fine.  You’ve clearly thought this plan out, so we’ll go through with it.  Why, is there something wrong with it?”

Peepers looked down at his report.  He had spent hours on his plan for the perfect domination of Cynquon 6, analyzed every detail.  The screen behind him displayed the painstaking equations Peepers had calculated to ensure their success, to which Dominator had only given a glance and a nod.  He hadn’t overlooked anything except…

“Nope, everything’s fine!” Peepers chirped, rocking back and forth on his feet.  He didn’t dare bring up Wander, as Dominator had made it clear that she didn’t consider him a problem.  Focusing on the practical aspects of invasion saved Peepers a lot of time, but it was almost too easy.

“Okay, cool.  Go back to your room or whatever, I don’t care.”  Domnator spun around in her chair, evidently done with the meeting but making no move to leave.

“You don’t?”  Truthfully, seeing Dominator so relaxed made her even more terrifying.  She didn’t care if there were holes in the plan, since she hardly needed a plan at all.  Peepers had only made things a little easier, a little more efficient.  Dominator claimed that Peepers saved her time she would’ve wasted waiting on the bots, but from the looks of things, Dominator had more time than she knew what to do with.  What did she even  _ do _ between invasions?

Bot 29 in tow, Peepers began to slip out of the meeting room, watching Dominator warily.  She had collapsed into her chair, leaning back with her arms hanging to the floor.  Peepers thought she was asleep until she jerked back up and gawked at the screen.

“Hey, runt, come look at this!” she shouted, typing furiously.  Peepers’ schematics were swapped for the ship’s security footage.  Most of the cameras were pointing at nothing but empty hallways, but a few were alight with blurs of movement.

“What’s going on?  Are we under attack?” Peepers demanded, eye darting from camera to camera.  What he was seeing didn’t register until one camera feed lit up with a telltale flash of green.

“It’s Hater and the rest of those eyeball losers,” Dominator answered, her voice lowered to a growl.  Peepers stepped back as her armor encompassed her body, helmet sliding over her smirking face.  “This is  _ way _ better than some boring invasion,” she said, her speech now deep and warped.

“Y-you can’t!” Peepers squeaked, wrapping his arms around Dominator’s hand, as if he could hold her back.  “W-what about our deal?”

Dominator raised her hand, bringing Peepers directly in front of her face.  “Relax, I won’t destroy them,” she said, her robotic voice unnaturally sweet, “but that doesn’t mean I can’t have a little fun!”

Tossing Peepers aside, Dominator strode out of the meeting room, but was launched backwards by a shot of lightning, crashing into the computer.  As Peepers cowered against the wall, Lord Hater stepped through the gaping hope he had made in the wall, another ball of electricity writhing in the palm of his hand.

“Dominator,” he snarled, wild eyes fixed on her as she rose back to her feet.  “You’ve tested my patience for the last time.  Ignoring my poetry is one thing, but when you kill my-”

A high gasp escaped Peepers’ throat.  Hater’s concentration broke, prematurely ending his monologue and dissipating his lightning.  Domnator raised her arms--now loaded with magma cannons--toward Hater, but he was busy staring at the trembling figure at the side of the room.

“Peepers?” Hater said, hardly more than mouthing the word, as a wave of lava propelled him out of the room.  Adrenaline picked Peepers up off the floor and sent him running toward Lord Hater, but it was too late.  Having found her footing, Dominator was attacking relentlessly, pushing Hater and his troops back single-handedly.  Amidst the sound of boiling lava blasts and the screams that followed, Peepers heard a gravelly “Retreat!”, and then the sound of the ship’s engine squealing away.  As quickly as it had started, the disruption had ended, leaving only the mundane sound of lava pulsing through the ship.

“Wow, what a  _ rush!   _ Almost thought he had me for a second,” Lord Dominator gushed, slipping out of her armor.  She stepped up to Peepers, wrapping a hand around his neck and turning his head up to hers.  “Good thing you being alive was enough to distract him, the dork!”

Dominator dropped Peepers and leaped into her chair, spinning around with her arms in the air.  “Think they’ll try to break in again?” she continued excitedly, watching the Skullship fly away on the computer screen.  “Guess I  _ have _ to keep you around now, that was the best fight I’ve had in  _ ages! _ ”

Peepers couldn’t answer Dominator, or even look at her.  He kept staring at the wall Hater had blasted through, although it had already sealed itself back up.  Had they really come just for him?  Peepers hadn’t considered the possibility of them even noticing his disappearance, much less caring enough to do something about it.

Seeing Lord Hater, even for a second, brought back all the doubts Peepers had had when taking this job.  He was a traitor, a traitor to the empire he had once commanded.  Not only had he betrayed their trust by working with the enemy, but it was because of him that they had barged in here, risking their lives for him.

And now that Hater knew he wasn’t dead, it was too late.  He couldn’t return to the Skullship without being killed on sight for treason, and even letting Dominator destroy him now wouldn’t do any good.  All he could do was continue working, just to guarantee their safety from Dominator.  It was a small comfort, but it was all Peepers had left.


	3. Chapter 3

Peepers slowly came to accept Dominator’s easygoing attitude, and had just about as much freedom here as he had had on the Skullship.  Bot 29 still followed him around at all times, but Dominator had let him modify it to make it more discreet.  Instead of a deadly robot, it was now modified into a pair of high-heel boots, a form Peepers was much,  _ much _ more comfortable with.  He also had free reign of the ship, but only exercised it as an excuse to show off his new footwear.

Meanwhile, Dominator’s galactic plague was spreading faster than ever before, leaving no planet uncrushed.  Peepers couldn’t help celebrating a little after each perfectly executed domination.  He had played his part in these victories, after all, and destroying planets was almost as much fun as conquering them.

There was only one thing nagging at Peepers’ conscience, and that was Lord Hater’s absence.  He hadn’t shown up since his first attack on Dominator’s ship, but a second attack seemed inevitable.  Hater wouldn’t let Peepers treachery go unpunished, and even with Dominator as a protector, Peepers still kept a fearful eye on the cameras for the Skullship.  At the rate Dominator was annihilating the galaxy, Lord Hater would have to try taking her down eventually, and Peepers had no doubt that he’d go down along with her.

He could only bide his time now, hoping against hope that Lord Hater wouldn’t come after him.

 

Lord Hater paced around his bedroom, unable to take more than two steps without stepping on a crumbled piece of paper.  A week’s worth of rejected plans and used tissues littered his bedroom floor, along with overthrown easels surrounded by their spilled poster boards, each diagram hastily scribbled out.  Peepers had made this stuff look so  _ easy _ , but Lord Hater couldn’t get through the initial stages of planning without throwing it all aside and starting from scratch.

After their first attempt to overtake Lord Dominator’s ship, the watchdogs’ eagerness had died down considerably.  Taking a cue from his soldiers, Lord Hater hadn’t told them that Peepers was alive to avoid another shipwide emotional meltdown.  He wouldn’t know how to explain it, anyway, since he didn’t understand it himself.

It hadn’t looked like Peepers was being held prisoner, but that was the only logical conclusion Hater could come to.  He had been thrilled to see Peepers alive, but with Dominator as a warden, that might not be true for much longer.  He had already lost Peepers once, he couldn’t go through that again, no matter what he had to do.

_ No matter what. _  Hater had to repeat this mantra as he stealthily left the Skullship for one of the few remaining planets.  It was quiet, its citizens having already evacuated to a safer galaxy, so Hater passed nothing but trees and empty huts as he walked.  Thankfully, all of Peepers’ tracking technology was still working, so Lord Hater didn’t have to go far to find what he was looking for.

As soon as he reached the clearing, a cheerful voice pierced the air.  “Hatey!” Wander cried, flinging his arms around Hater and beaming up at him.  Lord Hater had to resist the urge to electrocute him, instead giving him a tight, crooked smile of his own.

“You come all this way just to visit little-ol’ us?”  Wander asked as he gave Lord Hater a squeeze.

“Yeah, Hater, what’s your game?” Sylvia snarled, keeping some space between herself and Hater, fists raised and ready.  “Are we about to be swarmed by your little eyeball guys, because let me tell  _ you- _ ”

“I need your help!” Lord Hater shouted, prying his arms out of Wander’s hold.  The outburst surprised everyone, even Hater, who had been hoping to keep this meeting secret.  He didn’t have time to beat around the bush, though.  He had already procrastinated enough, exhausting all other options before turning to his most hated enemies.  For all he knew, it was already too late.

“Oh yeah? With what?” Sylvia asked, still tensed for battle.

“Dominator took Peepers, and I want him back!” Hater whined, stomping his feet.

Wander pressed his hands to his cheeks, a big goofy grin pushing them apart.  “ _ You _ want  _ our _ help!” he said in a breathless whisper.  “Does that mean we’re-”

“Yeah, we’re buddies, just help me rescue Peepers!” Hater rushed, not struggling with the ‘b-word’ like he usually did.

Sylvia was taken aback.  She dropped her fists and spun Wander around for a private meeting.  “Let me guess, there’s no way we’re turning him down, right?”

Still overjoyed that Hater had called them ‘buddies’, Wander nodded silently, his face still stuck in an enormous grin.

Sylvia sighed.  “Fine.  That little maniac’s probably less of a threat working with Hater than with Dominator, anyway.”

Turning back around, Sylvia took Hater’s hand and gave it a single shake.  “Okay, guess we’re in.  What’s the plan?”

Hater did his best to give Sylvia a smile, but her question stumped him.  “Uuh, I was kinda hoping you’d have one?”

Sylvia looked to Wander, but he only gave her a shrug.

Sylvia sighed again.  This time, she supposed, she’d have to be the brains  _ and _ the brawn.

 

Dominator’s ship hummed to itself, inactive for now, oblivious to the orbble bubble that was approaching it.

“You sure you can handle this, buddy?”

“No sweat, Syl!” Wander replied enthusiastically.  “I’m sure we can clear up this little misunderstanding in no time!”

Sylvia’s hands pressed into Wander’s shoulders.  “Okay, pal, just  _ promise _ me you’ll get out of there if things start getting rough.”

“Sure thing!” Wander smiled, pulling Sylvia in for a hug before splitting off into his own orbble bubble, leaving Sylvia and Hater behind.

“Seriously?  You think Wander’s going to be able to get Peepers back by himself?” Hater asked, watching as Wander’s bubble neared the ship.  Sylvia had sworn that orbble bubbles couldn’t be detected by Dominator’s ship, but he still expected her lasers to start firing at any moment.

“Grop no,” Sylvia snorted.  “What, you think we came all this way just to watch Wander try singing and hugging Dom into becoming a good guy?   _ We’re _ the ones who’re getting your eyeball back.”

Hater’s eyes widened, an unfamiliar flash of concern passing over his face.  “Wait, so you sent Wander straight to Dominator without any backup?”

“Would you really rather have Wander come with us?” Sylvia asked flatly.  “He’d want to try talking to Dominator first, anyway.  Better to use that as a distraction than to risk all our necks.  Wander’ll be fine.”

Hater was unconvinced, but it was too late now.  Wander had gotten inside Dominator’s ship, meaning it was time for them to follow.  “Come on, bonehead,” Sylvia said with a poorly-hidden smile, “let’s go get that commander of yours.”

Sylvia slipped Hater onto her saddle and set off toward the ship.  Hater felt awfully vulnerable with only a bubble protecting him instead of an entire ship.  Sylvia seemed to be right about the orbbles being invisible to Dominator’s ship, though, since they reached it without any trouble.

“Okay, blast us in,” Sylvia ordered, bringing the bubble as close to the ship as possible without bursting it.

“Hey, who put  _ you _ in charge?” Hater snapped.

“ _ You _ did when you asked me to come up with a plan!”

“Oh, uh, right,” Hater mumbled sheepishly.  He cleared his throat, took a few moments to gather the needed electricity, and shot a hole through the ship’s hull, just large enough for Sylvia to pull them inside.

“Since we don’t know where he is, we’ll need to cover as much ground as possible,” Sylvia said as they ran down the nearest hallway.  “Take down any bots you see.   _ I’ll _ keep an eye out for your pal.”

Hater nodded.  He had to admit, Dominator’s ship felt a lot less imposing now, when Sylvia was with him, than it had with all the watchdogs behind him.  They were only two people against her entire army, but she didn’t appear concerned in the slightest.

“You’re not, y’know, worried about Dominator?” he asked.

“Terrified,” Sylvia answered, though her face was set with determination.  She arched her neck around to smirk at Hater.  “Never stopped us from taking  _ you _ on though, has it?”

Something warm crept into Hater’s chest cavity, but the sight of a patrol of bots up ahead quenched it.  Hater artfully struck them down before Sylvia even reached them, allowing her to continue her breakneck speed.  Sylvia’s head darted left and right, scanning the walls for doors or windows, but there was no kind of entryway in sight.  A sense of dread crawled through her stomach; if Dominator was the only one who could access the rooms, they’d have to tear the whole ship apart to find Peepers.

Sylvia made a sharp turn around the corner, then stopped so suddenly that Hater was nearly thrown over her head.  He pulled on Sylvia’s reins, mouth open to demand why she had stopped, when he saw the reason himself.

Just a few yards down the hallway was Peepers, wearing his indulgently tall boots, a coffee cup reading “Best Minion” in his hand.

“S... _ Sir?!? _ ”

 

Wander frowned as he tried to tune his banjo, but it was no use.  The instrument just didn’t sound the same with half of the neck burnt by lava.

“Well, that’s just great,” he huffed, “and I had a whole song written for you!  ‘Course, I couldn’t do the dance anyway.”  Wander gave his legs another tug, but his feet remained trapped in a block of cooled lava.

“Don’t worry about it,” Dominator cooed, walking slow circles around Wander, “this’ll still be  _ very _ entertaining.”

“As much as I’d love to stay and chat, I actually have something important to ask you,” Wander said earnestly.  “See, my friend Lord Hater-”

“Hater?” Dominator’s cool exterior broke into excitement.  “Is that idiot on the ship, too?  Must be my lucky day!  Wait right here,” she cackled, pumping her arms in the air as her armor manifested around her.  “Round two, here we go!”

“Oh rats, that’s not at  _ all _ what I meant to happen,” Wander said, crossing his arms and looking down at his feet.  Oh well, he had been stuck in worse places.  Removing his hat and replacing his broken banjo with a hammer and chisel, Wander got to work chipping the lava away, one piece at a time.

 

The weight of Sylvia’s second passenger was hardly noticeable, but Hater seemed to be getting heavier and heavier as she ran.  Her pace slowed as she traveled back down the hallway, searching for the hole in the wall they had come through.

Peepers struggled to get off of Sylvia, but there was no escaping Hater’s vicelike grip on his tiny body.  “Sir, what are you doing?”

“We’re getting you out of here!” Hater yelled over the sound of his lightning blasts.  Bots were swarming from all directions now, and with only one free hand, Hater could hardly hold them off.

“But, Sir, I-”

“Thank me later, just let me focus!”

Peepers blinked.   _ That _ certainly wasn’t a word he heard Lord Hater use very often, although Peepers had told him to do so plenty of times.  Come to think of it, why were they riding Sylvia?  Lord Hater wasn’t acting like himself at  _ all. _

“Finally!” Sylvia panted once they reached the hole, jumping out of the ship and orbbling them away.  Safely back in space, Sylvia slowed to a walk, breathing heavily.  Peepers mutely watched Dominator’s ship shrink behind them.

Keeping his hand wrapped around Peepers, Hater glanced back, too.  “Hey, what about Wander?”

Sylvia froze, then dashed back toward Dominator’s ship.  Peepers didn’t know exactly what was going on, but understood enough to know that they were headed straight back to Dominator, and Peepers wasn’t about to let that happen.

“Wait a flarpin’ second, Zbornak!”  Peepers reached down to press a button on his boots, morphing them back into their original bot form.  “Bot 29, retrieve Wander,” he commanded.

The bot swiveled to face a seemingly random point on the ship, then flew straight to it.  The walls of the ship opened just wide enough for the bot to enter, then closed up behind it.

The trio waited a silent minute before the bot returned.  Fortunately, it had Wander in tow, not a barrage of angry bots or an even angrier Dominator.  The bot dropped Wander into the bubble and returned to Peepers, shifting back into a pair of flattering boots.

“Thanks, bot!” Wander said with a tip of his hat.  “Hammering away that lava was taking  _ forever _ .”  His eyes drifted up from the pair of boots to their wearer, and Wander squealed, “Mister Peepers, you’re back!  Dominator  _ did _ let you go, after all!”

“She sure did, buddy,” Sylvia nodded, winking at the other two when Wander wasn’t looking.

Still struggling to piece together what happened, Peepers turned to Hater.  “S-sir?”

“Better get that guy home, Hater.  And take better care of him this time,” Sylvia grinned, pushing Hater and Peepers into their own bubble while she and Wander rode off.

Wander waved as they set off.  “Byyyye, buddies!”

“We’re not-!” Hater started to yell, but remembered that he was still holding Peepers.  A green tinge crept into the space under Lord Hater’s eyes, and he dropped Peepers to the bottom of the bubble.  “Never mind,” he grumbled, trudging off to where he had left the Skullship.

Peepers walked alongside him, knowing better than to ask what had happened.  Neither he nor Lord Hater had been destroyed, and that was good enough for him.

 

Peepers had hardly set one foot inside the Skullship before he was swarmed by blubbering watchdogs.  Dozens of arms tried to hold him at once, and Peepers found himself unable to move.  He shoved and kicked at the unwanted affection, but that seemed to make matters worse. All of the watchdogs were bawling loudly, while only a handful were able to form coherent words.

“Commander Peepers, thank Grop you’re okay!” Andy cried, tears getting all over his microphone.

“Oh, Commander, we’re so glad you’re back!” Harold joined in, his normally perfectly-styled clothes now crumpled and damp.

A pair of yellow-gloved hands rescued Peepers from the melee of heartache.  “Stand down, watchdogs!” Lord Hater boomed, his powerful voice ending the free-for-all but not stopping one bit of the crying.  “Peepers needs to rest.  You are all to leave him alone for the rest of the day!”

Blinking the moisture from their eyes, the watchdogs dutifully returned to their posts, leaving Hater and Peepers alone.  The tearful welcome had come as a surprise to Peepers, but not as much of a surprise as Hater personally escorting him to his room.

“Sir, there really is something I should tell you,” Peepers confessed as they reached his room.

“It can wait, Commander Peepers,” Lord Hater replied firmly, the slightest catch in his voice.  “Right now, you are under orders to rest.  No working until tomorrow.  Is that understood?”

Peepers stepped through his door, then spun around on his heels to give Lord Hater a salute.  “Understood, Sir,” he said, more confused than enthusiastic.

His door closed, and Peepers let himself settle into his bed.  Like it or not, he was back on the Skullship.  He was certain now that telling Lord Hater about his deal with Dominator wouldn’t change anything, if Lord Hater would even listen.  Part of him was glad to be back on his old ship with his old army, his old boss.  But if Dominator was just going to try to destroy them all like before, was it worth it?  
Peepers’ door hissed open again.  Peepers shut his eye, pretending to be asleep, but not before he caught a glimpse of the looming figure silhouetted against the doorframe.

The figure waited a few seconds, then, apparently satisfied, let Peepers’ door hiss shut again.

Peepers pulled his blankets closer.   _ Yep, _ he thought,  _ definitely worth it. _

**Author's Note:**

> Criticism is greatly appreciated!


End file.
